Grief and the Collective
I have seen or heard the word grief more times than I can count in the last day. But for the first time in the last few months it’s not related to the loss suffered a few months ago by my family. Now, it’s related the loss of the collectives lives as we knew them. The loss of our stability and control we thought we had. The loss of any sort of plan we had of what was around the corner for us in our lives. The grief of realizing that all of that was a complete illusion in the first place. And for the first time today I made that connection of how I’m feeling now, to how I have been feeling in the wake losing dad.
Just like the grief of losing dad, I (and I think we) are all now rolling around being pushed and pulled in the deep waves of grief due to this pandemic. And all over again, after thinking I had swam to closer to shore and the waves had started to ease up just a tiny bit, I find myself back in that deep dark ocean. And I don’t know about you but that makes me feel VULNERABLE.
Also because the deep dark ocean freaks me the eff out, but that’s besides the point...
One moment our anxiety is high, the next feelings of sadness and despair and “what the hell is happening” float to the surface. That wave passes and we find resolve. We find the gratitude and some joy in the solitude and space. We find time to reflect on what’s important. Another wave hits and this time we are deep in fear. Fear for ourselves, for society, for small businesses and the self employed. For those who wonder how to pay their bills. For those that become sick. For those who have to isolate in less than wonderful situations. For those who don’t know how to exist in the space of quiet because their traumas hide there.
And then the wave passes, and we see the coming together of a neighbourhood, a community, a country, a world.
The next wave is filled with crushing isolation, and having to sit deep in our feelings. Subsiding, that isolation turns to a deep sense of togetherness as we all navigate these waves together.And on and on we go as we process, and breathe and cry and heal and move through a global pandemic laced with uncertainty, fear and every emotion in between.
“Every day starts, no matter what phase of the wave we are in.”
The beauty of grief is we all experience it at some point or another. Whether it’s the deep sense of grief losing someone you love, or the loss of a job, stability, a way of life, a relationship. It’s all painful grief. And It isolates us and binds us all at once.
I’ve heard it again and again - the only way through is through. Keep grieving, keep moving through the emotions, keep supporting each other, keep breathing.
As many told me and I try to remind myself both with dad and during this pandemic - the waves will pass, life will continue and it will never be the same.
And that’s scary and beautiful all at once. We are all here in this vulnerable space together <3
Xoxo,
elyse
Hello!! And welcome! I’m so happy you’re here.
I’m Elyse – a life and wellness coach, yoga and meditation instructor and intuitive (mostly) plant based dog mom of three! I am passionate about supporting others in coming home to themselves. I can’t wait to support you on your journey home!